Stop the pain. Please?! Stop the murderous rage coursing through my veins.
Stop the tears, the dry tears running down my pale cheeks.
Nobody can see.
My body is shaking, craving a cure bigger and better than cancerous nicotine.
My mind is tumorous, crazy, needing more than just illegal drugs.
Nobody can tell.
The pressures and demands, the stress and problems, all unload onto me.
Can no one see my shoulders are no longer as broad?
I can’t take on the world.
When once strong, I am now weaker than the weakest being alive.
When once I had all the answers , now in their place questions are all I find.
Solving them is no longer an opportunity, it went in his moment of lust.
Can no one see I just need to be left along?
I’m more lonely in a crowd than locked in my room…by myself…
You all say everything will be fine, I just need some help.
But no one can.
How can you support me if you don’t understand me?
Can’t look into my soul and tell what you see.
How could you see my soul when it’s unclear to even me,
hazy misty fog.
Does anyone even truly see as far as my heart?
is there one left?
It’s been torn and ripped apart so much that if I have one, it is surely pale as scars.
Is there a meaning to my life besides being a toy to be crushed in the of men?
Countless nameless cruelties done to me which return to terrorize my dreams.
Is there ever a decent nights sleep, more beyond a tireless few hours?
How I yearn for a peaceful eight hour nights sleep filled with child-like fantasy.
How i wish for this deeply ingrained terror to leave me be.
Who knows when I’ll wake up with a knife in my hand again?
I fear my sleep for to sleep long and deep meant to flashback and die all over again.
Slow and painful death each time I remember, each nightmare revisited.
Stop the pain. Please.